Isn’t it strange to look back at the timing of events, thoughts, conversations and see how things fit together? Little did I know, when I posted to my blog last week, circumstances would arise to give me opportunity to practice what I preached.
Just breathe. . .
I once attended some group counseling sessions and was taught about our inner “Dragon.” After much soul-searching and introspection, I learned my Dragon’s name:
“I-Don’t-Want-to-be-a-Disappointment.”
The theory of our dragon’s life is that, most of the time we’re all fine, rational, emotionally- tamed adults. But, there are certain situations in life that will nudge our dragon from her sleep. She’ll wake up slowly and just move around the cage a little. . .bumping in the night and stepping on things. Then suddenly, something will be said or perceived and our dragon will bust right through that cage door, nostrils blazing and smelling of brimstone!
What in the world is she talking about??!! What does this have to do with that other post about breathing the name of God??!!
Well, last week, some things were perceived to be a threat to my dragon and all weekend long, she was bellowing in my head. She would wake me up at night with all sorts of “what ifs” and “what now?”. . .and last night as we went to bed, I cried and shared my concerns with my sweet husband and found that I was NOT breathing the name of God as I so want to do. I was breathing the name of MY DRAGON!
How many times did I say, in just one conversation: “I don’t want to be a disappointment” or “I try so hard, are they disappointed in me?” Not once did I speak the one name that can calm the beast inside me.
“YHWH”
My Yaweh, my Deliverer, Jehovah El-Roi, my God Who Sees Me, forgive me for speaking another’s name in my distress. Your name is the only one that will bring peace, shelter, safety, trust and security. I will speak YOUR name only, no matter WHAT comes my way each day.
YHWH. . .breathing in, YHWH breathing out.
Bab's Blog 
Interesting concept. Why do Christians give so much authority to the devil when “Greater is He that is in me then he that is in the world?” 1 John 4:4. When I begin to feel overwhelmed, I slow down and realize that God only wants His best for me. At that point I think about what God wants me to learn from this experience, and I listen to that still small voice to educate me. You are in HIs Hands and no one will pluck you out of them!!! Life is sometimes like watching a scary movie at home. We must stop and realize that no harm can come through that television set, it’s in our minds and we have power over our thoughts. Thanks for posting this.
Thanks for your comment Ellie! I appreciate you taking the time to read and share your own thoughts.
I try really hard to not give any authority or credit to the devil. This was just a revelation to me, that I had not been following what I’d said just last week. And, that’s a pretty common theme for anyone. . .Christian or not.
Having battled cancer and continuing to live with diabetes, I have learned how big my God is and what He is capable of. I don’t question that at all. However, I am a human too and it’s easy to let those feelings of self-doubt creep in. We just have to recognize them for what they are and get real.
I had a Pastor once that used to refer to that as “Fixin’ the Stinkin’ Thinkin’.”
Thanks again for the comment and I hope to hear from you more often! I’m on my way over to your blog too, so I can see what you’re up to.
Congratulations, I have nominated you for an Inspiring Blogger award because your great thoughtful blogs have always inspired me.
So, here are the rules:
1. Display the award image on your blog.
2. Link back to the person who nominated you.
3. State 7 things about yourself.
4. Nominate 15 other bloggers and link to their sites.
5. Notify the bloggers that they have been nominated and link to the post.
I hope others will find your blog through this and be as inspired by your courage and faith as well!
Your posts on breathing remind me of this video – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o2idetRjqJM
I show it to my students every year just as things start to get busy.
Wow! That’s essentially what I had read in Real Simple. This has been so life-altering for us. DH and I keep reminding each other to breathe. . .breathe His name: YHWH the unspeakable name of God.
Thanks for sharing this Sara! I love it!